Self-Doubt


There is a universal tradition which states that everyone is friendly and kind when times are easy, but a person’s true nature becomes apparent in the face of trials and calamities.

When I am in the presence of some of some people, in all outward immaturity, childishness, and lack of sobriety, I can’t help but see these negative qualities and hope that I never have them. I think that’s not how a person should be, and use that as a rubric to avoid. In that sense, its a positive thing.

But then when a difficulty afflicts me, especially a major one, I see the worst characteristics of myself come out. I see my arrogance, my selfishness, my ungratefulness, my short-sightedness, my small-mindedness, etc. I can’t help but wonder, is what is coming out of me at this moment really who I am? Is this my true exposition?

If so, then I am a rotten person who desperately needs to mature.

What then is the process to change? How does one strengthen his inner soul? The best solution that I’ve come to know is to allow yourself to experience pain, but still hold fast to what you believe to be true, and hopefully when you come out of it you are a stronger person. But I frequently see myself waver and falter. Secondly, given my constraints in life, I am trying to experience the world as much as possible. I hope that those experiences will strengthen my inner character. We’ll see.

This leaves me with a lack of self confidence.

Advertisements

About Nahraf
Providing interesting insight into the world of Economics, Theology, Computer Science and Social phenomena.

One Response to Self-Doubt

  1. maica says:

    i feel that way too, it’s like you begin to doubt yourself when the worst hits you. insha’Allah, those are trials that Allah gives to us, to make us be closer to him and be strong.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: